Content Warnings: the following letter contains intense racial stereotypes, blatant racism, anti-Semitic ideas/neo-Nazi ideals. While there are no explicit racial slurs, this letter may make you feel uncomfortable because of derogatory racial themes.
I have a racist friend. He makes jokes all the time about how Jews run the world and should be violently put down. He glorifies something called “vril,” which is apparently the neo-Nazi version of spiritual energy. He says that blacks are felons and that Chinese immigrants steal industry secrets. He tells me that things would be a lot simpler if we just reinstated segregation.
But, sometimes, I don’t think he’s truly racist. I’m Asian, but he treats me with respect during our conversations. He talks with me about philosophy and the meaning of life, and race rarely comes up. He often tries to make non-racist jokes, too.
He once talked about his time in the military. Apparently, lots of people there were racist, and he had to make racist jokes to fit in. Later, I watched a criticism of the military that said anybody who didn’t fit in would be beaten up. Maybe he wasn’t racist before the military. I don’t know much about psychology.
I’m not sure what to think about him, so I continue being friends with him…Sometimes I wonder if it’s hurting my mental health. But I don’t know if there’s a clear-cut answer. I hear that people can change. I hope that I can help him to be less racist. I hope that this friendship doesn’t crash. It’s nice to imagine that someone who has a similar friend will read this and feel less lonely.
Thanks for reading.
